Chestnut Takes You In, Walnut Takes You Out

“But, I don’t know how to drive in the city!” I exclaimed.  I’m on the phone with my friend Rachel S.; former suburban neighbor; transformed into stylish, hip, and “total-in-the-know” Philadelphian.  “Omg Katie, it’s so easy!  It’s just a straight shot all the way.”  With cell tucked between shoulder and ear, I’m trying to put on my eyeliner; playing the careful balancing act of holding the phone and drawing a straight line.

“Katie, seriously, stop being a baby.  It couldn’t be simpler.”  “Which tree is it again?” I ask.  “Chestnut!  Just always remember – Chestnut takes you in; Walnut takes you out.”  “Well what if . . . dangit!,” black liner on my cheek, phone on the ground, followed by my purse tumbling to the ground, spilling the contents of my life all over the floor.  Resigned to doing one thing well, I pick up the phone, “Sorry.  Well, what if I have to :::gasp::: parallel park?”  “Katie, you’re gonna have to learn sometime!”

“Ok, ok. Chestnut in, Walnut out; Chestnut in, Walnut out” – I mutter, look at my newly minted license – “Gotta learn sometime.” – I’m off and running.

Of course, Rachel was right.  H-town to Center City is basically one straight shot into the heart of Philly.  I can’t remember if I actually had to parallel park that day; or, frankly, where we went.  But, I remember that I drove victoriously into and out of the city that day for the very first time – by myself – without getting lost – and was damn proud of it.

That summer was a summer of exploration, during which I proceeded to get lost countless times.  (Even with fearless leader, Rachel, riding shotgun.)  “We’re not lost.  We’re just turned around.  Go the other way.  Uh Oh.  That wasn’t right either.  Let’s do it again.”  I came to understand, that you’re never really lost for long in Philly.  It’s all part of the adventure. 

Of course, I’ll admit, the one-ways can be a nuisance.  And, despite Billy Penn’s inventive grid of Trees and Numbers, there are always a few exceptions to test your mettle – like the Parkway, or the dead end at Spruce.  Why, if you’re lucky, you might even, as I did, get lost under the Post Office and 30^th Street Station.  (which I still think was a parallel dimension)  But, whenever I got rattled, out came my mantra – “Chestnut takes you in; Walnut takes you out.” – And, my perspective got set again.

I’ll admit that it wasn’t until after securing my job, that I realized just how valuable an asset my new perspective would be.  Now, however, after years of personal appearances and special events all over the city, I feel like a true Philly girl. And, I can pin-point the exact time the whole city-adventure-directional-karma came together for me.  I was a “freshman” dancer headed for an appearance somewhere on North Broad.  I came to City Hall – Had to choose a direction – Chose one like someone might choose the next step of a “create-your-own-adventure” book – And, before long, saw cars parked in the middle of the street, double parked, and pointing in all manner of direction.  “Wait a minute. . . No one parks like this . . . This has to be South Philly!  I’m on South Broad.”  I spun on a dime – after all, it was South Philly – and made it to my appearance with time to spare, despite my original error.   Ecstasy – Triumph – Invincibility – I was actually beginning to know my way around this town.  I wasn’t merely in the city now; I was PhillyIn!

Here we are 5 years later, and few can claim to know the highways, byways and neighborhoods of Philly better than this former confessed “scare-dy cat” and “country mouse.”  Yes, Yes, I know that driving Chestnut can be like playing a video game – dodging potholes and turning cars, doing the double-parked tango, all the while trying to “Be One” with its carefully-timed traffic-lights.  And, I know that 76 is always a crap-shoot, with traffic that can jam at 3:00 in the AM.  And, Market and Broad are no synch either.  But, look at it this way.  You usually have to “pay-to-play” for the video game fun, and this fun is free – or rather “free-for-all.” 

And, here I am, a parallel-parking PRO!  (Ok.  Maybe not so much a pro – but, — like the Beatles say – “I’m getting better all the time!” – And I’m not afraid to try.)  My directional mantra has set me for life.  If I can do it, you can too.  Be brave.  Discover!  Repeat after me – “Chestnut takes you in; Walnut takes you out.”

The city is where everything happens.  I work, eat and play in Philadelphia, and sleep at home (when I’m not “crashing” at one of my “oh-so-lovely-city-friends’” digs).  But, my real life is here, and Chestnut takes me to it.  Maybe, some day soon, I’ll dispense with Walnut altogether.  It’s my life – and now that I’m PhillyIn, I don’t need directions for it.  I’m Kate – Nice to meet you Philly!